[Devils-list] Rangers.....Devils.....kinda like kicking the old family dog around :)

DevAngel Publishing crasher@si.rr.com
Sat, 31 Mar 2001 17:57:08 -0500


the CRASHER line
-----------------------------
     T'was a midday afternoon near the end of March, the playoffs are a buzzin
and the Rangers are preparing to golf...I dunno...I just woke up when I wrote
this and I feel like i owe y'all a better one for just passing out and 
basically
missing that Atlanta game on Wednesday....but then again if it wasn't on
that horse's ass channel METRO Julie would have done it....but she's in
Michigan now, leaving just lil ol me to carry ya through until we leave for
Montreal :)

Pre-Game Notes:
==============
-- Alex Mogilny is both one assist and one goal away from a 40/40 season
    not too oftenly done in Devil history, and hey there's a slim chance of
    11 goals in 5 games....right ????? But I dunno...I'd kinda like Alex to 
resign
    and that's only gonna push his value up too much :p...besides we all know
    if he takes the money and signs with the Rangers or say the Hawks (and I
    WILL get to them on Monday :p..or Tuesday *l*) he's gonna suck and be
    a bust anyway...all free agents do that !!
-- I do have to once again apologize for being sick and having TiVo fritz up on
    me (by not erasing the last Nitro like it was supposed to) and I ran 
out of "TiVo
    tape" to keep the Atlanta game...and disturbingly enough it bombed out on
    a picture of Pandolfo....eeewww....27" inches of RAW JAY...Melrose would
    be proud :)
-- and since we all know about this streak (*cough cough* 23 :p)  let's 
just leave
    it as that as the only thing more automatic is well the Rangers missing the
    playoffs :)....and well here's Melrose back AGAIN to wack off at players at
    will :p...can you see the lust in his eyes as he declares his love for 
the EA
    Sports line...eep...calling him maybe the best LW in the NHL...that's a 
HEX !!
-- this is the Devils game in hand on Ottawa for the lead in the East...if you
    care about that....I don't :p....but with a win today Marty joins Terry 
Sawchuk
    and Jacques Plante as the only 3 NHL goalies to have 3 40-win seasons !!


Today's Goalies:
============
NJ: Brodeur (39-16-11, 2.31 gaa, 90.7%) team defense == 5th
NY: Hebert (15-28-5, 3.23 gaa, 89.5%) team defense == LAST
        McLean (7-10-1, 3.56 gaa, 88.6%)

Special Teams Stats:
================
NJ pp: 66/295 (22.4%-2nd), pk: 256/302 (84.8%-12th)
      shg for: 8, against: 6
NY pp: 62/347 (17.9%-11th), pk: 300/381 (78.7%-29th)
      shg for: 14, against: 12

Injuries/Scratches:
===============
NJ: Stevenson (ankle), Corkum, Sutton
NY: Malakhov  (knee), Pilon (Hamstring), Lefebyre (Shoulder sprain) ,
          Kloucek (Heel ), Fleury (Personal), Brown (Foot ), Richter (Knee )
       Taylor (Abdominal )

First Period
-----------------
-- now THAT'S a lack of respect....Pandolfo/Nemchinov and Stone Hands start
    the game :p
-- Holik....long shot..save Hebert...Madden races in for the follow...SAVE 
Hebert !!
-- Rafalski...Elias....cycled in front...blocked Jonsson.....Arnott...the 
follow..DENIED
    IN FRONT...on that NO touch pass...nice call Melrose....take your hand 
out of
    your pants dufus :p
-- and Melrose fantasizes about those 3 young men who just LOVE doing 
everything
    together :p....hey it's nice he's talking about us....but yeah go 
ahead...lust at McCarthy
    who is off to the box for setting a pick on his 4th big hit in 2 shifts !!
-- NJ pp (5/22 vs NY):
    and we start out in the prick with 2 nuts line in front (AKA Holik 
w/Sykora and Elias :p)....we made that up last night :)
    Dvorak...Messier...broken up Rafalski after the Devils had some good 
shots miss
wide the other way !!!
   Stevens...Nieds....Gomez.....down to Mogilny....in front for  McKay who 
FIGHTS
free....but MISSED THE PASS !!!!....Gomez....the follow..SAVE Hebert !!!!!! 
Hey
Kim-UHAY...where'd your stick go ??? *smirk*
    Gomez....Alex....back to Gomez...time runs out...but the shot doesn't 
SAVE Hebert
on the rising wrister !!!!
-- and Melrose marvels at Marty's vast size :p
-- McKay....split the D...but it cost him the puck....Messier back...for 
Dvorak...denied
    Marty with the stick check !!
-- Holik...Daneyko....waits...FIRES....Hebert NEVER sees it....but it 
bounces off him
    anyway !!!
-- hey they may be dumb commercials....but that Gridlock University idea 
has some
    merit !!! But then again people in this area are too damn stupid to 
even be able to
    talk and drive at the same time :p...but that's just the facts peoples :p
-- eep...something about Melrose and spanking in the same word...*ulp*
     I need to get out more me thinks :p...damn Microsoft classes :p
-- wha ??? the Devils were NOT playing well going into the playoffs last 
year idiot !!
     know your facts ass !!! They were 4-4 and had to eek out that last win 
in OT vs
     Florida (but yes it DID set the tone for the ensuing sweep :p)..I hate 
Melrose...go
    coach the Rangers :)
-- Forbes...off the draw......SAVE Marty !!!!
-- and so far no phone calls from Julie live in Detroit for the Dead Wings 
game...
    oh yeah......they're going tomorrow....I'm SORRY :p....and antsy today *l*
-- hey the Rangers are two away from a record....MOST LOSSES IN A SEASON :)
    gonna lose....alot...might as well do it right eh ???
-- Stone Hands....to the slot...fires...kicked out Hebert.....Nemchinov the 
follow....
    goes wide.....Nieds a steal.....to....*doh* Jay shoots it right into 
his belly and even
    GUY HEBERT can stop that :p
-- Gomez....fakes the shot....gives to Brylin...BACK TO GOMEZ....who JUST 
MISSED
     the layup on the empty net !!!!
-- Gomez...Mogilny....ROCKET SHOT....SAVE Hebert....Fidget digs it 
out....stuff....
    stuff...but he can't move Hebert's leg...puck keeps moving.....no 
whistle...back to
    the point...WHITE THE FOLLOW...SAVE HEBERT !!!!
-- Holik again...SAVE Hebert as Doc mildly puts it.....delusions of Richter *l*
-- Nieds....walks in...back to Daneyko...shot...JUST missed...Devils keep 
and swarm
    with an almost unstoppable cycle (shots ARE 10-2)....Rangers are just 
getting
    smoked....except on the lil board up above !!! :p
-- Elias...wins his battle on ANOTHER  cycle....cross to 
White...FIRES....Hebert holding
    on like it's another expansion team in front of him !!!
-- Nemchinov....goes behind the net...drops for Mogilny...but it's caught 
in his skates !
-- Melrose: "How come the Devils get EVERY loose puck after each scramble ??"
    Answer....they're BETTER :p...moron :p
-- Messier holds onto Bobby Holik who goes flying as Captain Geritol goes 
for the
    tripping minor...as St Louis allows a goal on their first shot :p
-- NJ pp:
    Rafalski...Arnott....pile of bodies  in front but Hebert kicks it out  !!!
    Rafalski...Elias....Sykora...Rafalski.....to Arnott in his shooting 
hole....FIRES
blocked Dvorak !!!
    NO MELROSE YOU CAN NOT COACH THE DEVILS !!!! You'd RUIN IT !!! :p
   Nieds...McKay...shove shot...missed way wide....Devils cycle again...see 
a pattern ??
   but that pp is done too....
-- Malhotra....he's playing today ?? :p....Dvorak....cuts in....off speed 
shot....gloved
    Marty as Dvorak whiffs on it....but those can be a BITCH too :p
-- and as Melrose admires McKay's ZIPPER (don't ask :p)...Leetch off the draw
    and OFF THE POST as Marty DIVES !!!!
-- Devils last chance.....Nemchinov...O'Donnell....fires....MISSED the net 
but they're
     was a Ranger penalty upcoming...we'll get to that in the second period !!!

Second Period
---------------------
-- Purinton off for the stick hold...and away we go...
-- NJ pp:
     Arnott...Elias...back to Arnott...can't keep...offside !!!
     Elias...Sykora....cuts left....winds...FIRES...but Hebert sees it all 
the way !!!
     Nedved...picked by Niedermayer....down the wing...fires...missed high !!!
     Devils do nothin on pp.....Scott adds Julie's Tampa recap to the 
archives :p
-- Messier and Nemchinov go tumbling in the corner....and Nemchinov gets
    the call for a stick hold....purely an even up call :p
-- NY pp:
    Madden gives to Leetch who feels bad....and gives it RIGHT BACK TO MADDEN
....jumps on it...takes off...makes the right call in NOT giving to 
Pandolfo....shoots
and Hebert eats it up !!!
     Leetch....shot...blocked....Leetch..NOT to Madden...BUT OUT COMES SYKORA
on the Stevens steal.....down the wing....looks....fires...OFF THE 
POST....and well
they were due for something :p

(1 - 0, NY) Nedved[32-pp] (McCarthy, Leetch) {4:12}
after the post shot....damn Czech :p
Nedved...in the slot.....Nieds tries to get in the way...but can't....and 
Nedved
gets that shot in the PERFECT place and Marty can't move the glove in the
way !!

-- well they're REALLY due ???

(2 - 0) Graves [10] (Forbes) {4:26}
Julie is banned from any road trips...WHY ARE THE TEN RANGERS FANS
CELEBRATING ?? You're GOLFING in 8 days :p....the angles ABC is showing
on the replays SUCK...O'Donnell...turnover.....Forbes behind the net to 
Graves from
the angle....shoots....and beats Marty's glove on the bad angle.....

-- and then Arnott to the box for interference....
-- NY pp (1 for last 1 vs NJ :p):
    Leetch...Messier...in front....save Marty and tossed out Madden !!!
    O'Donnell...Elias....IN FRONT FOR SYKORA.....DIVING SAVE HEBERT with the
RIGHT PAD AND SKATE !!!!
    York....in front...shot...save....rebound LOOSE IN FRONT BUT MARTY SOMEHOW
REACHES AND GETS A GLOVE ON IT....that can be a game changing save :p
     Madden tosses out of play that bullet is dodged and killed !!!
-- and with a team FILLED of forty year olds.....who BETTER to do this to 
???? :)

(2 - 1) MOGILNY[40 !!!!] (Rafalski) {7:49}
LOOK AT THIS SPEED AND MOVES....Mogilny around Klouchek...like HE WAS
NEVER THERE....BLOWS THROUGH....LOOKS....OUT MOVES PAST HEBERT
AND HEBERT HAS NO CHANCE TO GET THAT ONE !!!!!!
And welcome to the Devils record books Alex !!!! :)

--Devils SWARMING and Hebert sore and limping after the stretch on the McKay
    one timer !!!!!
-- McKenzie...shot...save...Daneyko the follow...geeze even he has like 
FOUR shots :p
    SAVE HEBERT AGAIN !!!!
-- Elias...Sykora....ROCKET and it JUST MISSED THE NET !!!
-- Elias...fakes to Sykora....drops to Arnott....FIRES...save Hebert !!!
-- McCarthy...controls...wheels...to the slot...fires...kicked out Marty 
and again on the
     follow !!
-- Grosek....Hlavac.....fakes....Marty over commits.....but Hlavac missed 
wide !!!
-- FLOWER BOY ????

(3 - 1) Grosek[8] (Nedved) {12:45}
Nedved recovers in the corner....behind the net....soft saucer type pass
to DO YOU HAVE TO REMIND ME WHAT THE HAWKS GAVE AWAY FOR THIS
IDIOT ????....arghn !!!...anyway....no Flowers from Grosek today just a 
backhand
the wobbles and finds a hole in Marty

-- Brylin....McKay...JUST can't get to in front 
!!!.....Holik....Fidget...DENIED Hebert !!!
-- if I had a dog now I would be kicking it :p.....after all he'd be from NY :p
    but I don't and Hebert is now getting ones he don't even know he has :p
-- McKenzie....high slot.....looms...rolls....hunts....and shoots wide :p
-- Pandolfo creamed but Purinton....that's always good :)
-- Grosek....from the corner....lobs in front...Marty covers and 
hostilities ensue
     ....gee....you mean this is a GAME tonight ??? :p....HEY JULIE....you 
guys gonna
     be on ESPN 2 tonight :p...end that Dead Wing streak :)
-- Nedved and Stevens off for roughing minors....Nedved jawing at Stevens like
    he'll treat him like some baby sitter in Vancouver :p.....that's like 
dumb :p
-- 4 on 4:
     Elias....DOWN THE WING.....OFF THE SAME POST :p....2 nuts indeed :p
     Sykora....tied up in front...Arnott the follow...delayed call 
comin.....Rafalski
to Gomez from the bench.....centers....PICKED OFF...and Elias COMES UP
SWINGING !!!    .......and all HELL and moods are breaking lose !!! Let me 
rewind
THAT !!! AND ARNIE GOES APESHIT AND IS GIVING HELMET NOOGIES  TO
  SOMEONE DOWN THERE....now THIS IS MORE LIKE IT !!!!! And Arnott WANTS
SOME OF MESSIER....oh let them GO jerks !! :p
-- Messier and Elias shown the door....and Melrose is standing at full mast
     while sitting down so to speak :P yes they've been BAD boys Barry :p
-- and now the penalties :).....at 17:32
     Arnott (fighting major, misconduct), Elias (fighting major)
     Messier (misconduct), Mottau (fighting, major) and of course Leetch for
holding.....so :)
-- NJ pp:
   and just a reminder Arnott AND Messier are done for the night !
    Rafalski....shot.....save McKay rebound....to Mogilny....McKay 
again...denied
Hebert.....Sykora....the follow...MISSED !!!!
    Rafalski....Mogilny.....and LOOK WHAT I DID TO YOU AGAIN !!!!!!!!!!

(3 - 2) Mogilny[41-pp] (Sykora, Rafalski) {18:45}
They pissed off the angry beast :).....puck back to the point....McKay
ties up his man in front....Sykora....the BLAST....off McKay's leg....right
to Mogilny....looks....OVER HEBERT AND INTO THE WIDE OPEN NET !!!!

-- Nieds down the wing...kicked out Hebert and 4 on 4 over also !!!!
-- Leetch gives and gets from Hlavac....SAVE MARTIN !!!!
-- Hlavac....shot...SAVE Marty....Devils regain...last 
rush.....Nemchinov....held
    off Madden....wide and the second ends with a ROAR !!!!

Third Period
-------------------
-- and in a case of mild amusement...the Penguins realizing they SUCK 
defensively :p
     they decide to START TRAPPING....God I love SAYING THAT :p....and gee they
     realized....hey it takes SOME TALENT to playa  good trap now doesn't 
it ??? *smirk*
     My God...I'm saying something nice about the Blues :p....but hey I 
respect Mary-O
     and Jagr and that traveling whine show less than one VERY rotten apple 
from St
     Louis :p....anyway....back at the Swamp :)
-- Stevens cuts off a pass....to Holik...over the line...fires...save 
Hebert !!!!......and
     Pandolfo stumbles along the boards :p
-- Fidget...fakes...pivots...fires....off the wrong foot....freezes Hebert 
but the puck
    JUST missed !!!....Dvorak...comes back...shot...blocker save Marty !!
-- McKenzie....to the slot...dips to White....winds...FIRES...kicked out 
Hebert !!!
-- Dvorak...shoots...off York...winged by the shot and ends up blocking it !!!
-- Dvorak....Leetch in front..save...Malhotra rebound...DIVING SAVE MARTY !!!!
-- Mogilny....with room...and the SHOT...missed the net !!!!
-- Madden.....flies in....stops...cuts...spins...and loses :p
-- Matto....McCarthy...Nedved...OFF THE POST !!!
-- McKay....back to Nemchinov on the follow.....rips wide....Devils keep 
and cycle
    White the shot...SAVE Hebert !!!
-- Matto....Nedved...over to Grosek...BUT FLOWER BOY ONCE AGAIN STUFFED
    BY A DIVING MARTY !!!!!
-- Gomez...Mogilny....winds...fires....Hebert JUST gets a piece of it !!!
-- White caught pinching to keep....and a 2 on 1 gets ugly :p

(4 - 2) McCarthy[11] (none) {8:03}
but if someone in Blue deserves one it was him :p McCarthy steals
from White....2 on 1....never looks pass....forehands......to backhand...
stuffs and buries a NICE goal on a sweet move....but he's STILL scum :p

-- McCarthy draws a tripping penalty....and off goes Niedermayer
-- NY pp:
     Hlavac.....Grosek...SAVE Marty !!!
     DIPSHIT....SYKORA AND ELIAS ALWAYS KILL PENALTIES.....PRETEND
to know what you're talking about Melrose :p
    Daneyko UPENDS Malhotra....and THAT'S a trip ???....oh yeah it is :p
-- NY 5 on 3:
    Rangers don't get the zone till the first penalty ends....
-- NY pp:
     Pandolfo...with Niedermayer doing a screen...fires....save Hebert !!!
     Rangers having FITS with the Devils pk units but they are killing 
time.....
     and the penalties are done....and 6:20 to go in the game......
-- Rafalski....steps into the pass.....cruises in....shoots...missed the 
short side
    high...so much for the low shots :p
-- Mogilny...splits the D....and pulled down by BOTH...why no penalty shot 
??? :p
-- NJ pp:

     Rafalski...off the draw....flings the shot...blocked 
....recovers...but loses again !!
     Holik...Elias...waits....cross to Holik....shot..SAVE...scramble....in 
front...SAVE
Hebert !!!!
     Rafalski...ANOTHER bomb missed wide......Holik.....Elias...missed...Sykora
keeps...fires...SAVE Hebert...Rafalski the keep...SAVE Hebert....and it's 
NOT OVER
YET FOLKS !!!!

(4 - 3) McKay[22-pp] (Rafalski, Elias) {16:48}
Devils OWN the puck....and shot AFTER SHOT AFTER  SHOT...back
to the point...repeat....Rafalski....shot/pass to McKay in the slot....GETS
THE STICK ON IT AND TIPS IT PAST HEBERT WHO NEVER SAW IT !!!!

-- Dvorak...in front...Malhotra...SAVE Marty....and it is LOUD in that 
Swamp !!!
-- Holik...loses...regains...hands to Sykora....shoots....tipped 
Elias...but he
    smothered it !!!....and 2:07 to go !!!
-- Rafalski...and Nieds miscommunicate.....puck up the boards to Forbes...he
     shoots...SAVE Marty !!! 1:42 left....
-- Elias...to Nieds...pass too far..>Nieds DIVES and gets to Elias.....back 
to Rafalski
    he shoots...SAVE Hebert...and 1:00 left....Marty to the bench !!!
     ALOT of fighting along the right wall.....Rangers ice with 12 seconds 
left !!!
     and hey at least the rivalry KINDA means something now....but then 
again MAKE
THE PLAYOFFS :p
****time out Devils****
-- and here goes.....
     Nedved wins the draw....not out....Elias....from the corner....last 
chance prayer....
denied Hebert....and well it's a rivalry again :p....not like these things 
last forever
....shame ya can't make the playoffs....TOODLES :)

Shots on Goal:  1 + 2 + 3 + 4 == total
==============================
Devils:              13 + 18  + 10 ==  41
Agers:                 4 + 10  +  5  ==  19

Power Plays:
===========
NJ: 2 / 5
NY: 1 / 4

Att: 19,040

My Three Stars:
=============
3. Sandy McCarthy....hit....played physical and ended up getting the game 
winner
     that was WAY more important than it looked at the time !!!
2. Alex Mogilny.....goals 40 and 41...the sweepstakes is on for him !
1. Guy Hebert.....he forgot where he was actually stole this game :p

     Well next game is Monday and it wasn't for the fucking USELESS GIANTS
this game would have been in January and 1. I'd have GONE and 2. We'd have
had one HELL of a game as both teams were FLYING then...but now it's April
and I get to slam the nails on the Hawks horrid season in my own dear way :)
so poison your twinkies....and if you think I bash Pandolfo....just wait 
till Twinkie
Boy rolls into the Swamp :)


*start of sig file begins here....for the technolgically impaired :)*

                *********************************************
           oh yeah....my homepage....live it...love it....KNOW IT !!!!

                  http://www.geocities.com/crasher21

to see Julie's less than stable recaps :)
             http://www.angelfire.com/nj2/hockeywitch/index.html

lots of cool on line and gizmos and stuff :)
            http://www.kerriswarehouse.com


this is the beginning of my sig file....these are just quotes I have picked
up over the years and find them fitting...and most of you don't read THIS far
anyway :)...and for the most the quotes below have been here so long that I
prolly don't even REMEMBER what's here !!!!!

"It's not a wide-open game, which they would love. If
we're not allowed to hit and if we're not allowed to
check, I'm going to come back, too. I'm going to make
a comeback. I'm going to play in this league if nobody
touches me. If no one backchecks on me, and if they
let me make plays and shoot on the net and get 2-on-1's
and breakaways, I'm going to go back and play. I could
play for fun, but I know I'm going to get killed if
we play for real."

Wild coach and Hall of Fame former player Jacques
Lemaire responding to complaints by Pittsburgh players
that Minnesota's defensive-style turns off fans.
The Wild, by the way, have sold out every one of
their home games this season.


"For Kevin Dean (who couldn't cut it on 2 different teams this season) to be
on our first pairing of defensemen is pretty scary. While it's nice that he
got a goal, I can't help but be reminded that even a blind squirrel finds
an acorn"
-- Rob, Chi BlackHawks email list 2/14/2000

There is a line that many comedians use:
"If you didn't offend someone, you weren't funny"
(I LIVE by this phrase !!)

Too often, we lose sight of life's simple pleasures.  Remember, when
someone annoys you it takes 42 muscles in your face to frown BUT, it only
takes 4 muscles to extend your arm and bitch-slap the motherfucker upside
the head...pass it on.....

Avalanche coach Bob Hartley said he received a "love you" e-mail. "I opened 
up my e-mail (Friday) morning and I got one of those 'I love you' notes," 
Hartley said. "I opened it and I was very disappointed. I thought it was 
from Scotty (Bowman)."

"I save money.  I clip coupons.  AND I AM A HETEROSEXUAL MALE!"
~David Ross Johnson, as the guest of honor at a Cale Hulse fan club meeting  :)